What matters most is this




It happened when my friends and I had gone to a different city to attend one of the biggest student fests in India – Saarang (en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saarang). I was stoked because my parents readily gave me the permission to go. I was in my second year of college (sophomore) and this was my first-ever trip out of town where I was not accompanied by any guardian or family member. So the equation was definitely ‘yayyyy’ to the power of infinity.


Since it was a five-day fest, there were a lot of workshops one could take part in. Our group chose salsa. Since we were all girls, we were paired with other boys on the spot. It was fun, needless to say, and we would usually be exhausted by the end of our two-hour session every day.




On the last day of the session, I came to know that one of the guys from our six-member group had a crush on me. It was a little awkward, well, because I am an awkward person. I knew he was going to say something to me on the last day as the boys had made a plan to meet up ‘one last time’ in the evening.


When we arrived at the auditorium (that’s where we would practice), I saw the lover boy all dressed up in formals, which made all of us go “awww” behind his back. But you could easily make out he was nervous when he took me aside to talk. But since I didn’t feel the same way, I lied to him saying I was already dating (immature, I know).


But he, on the other hand, was very mature. He asked whether he could still call me and whether we could just be friends. He was such a gentleman and didn’t creep out that I saw no harm in doing that. Other than that, he is a geek and so I am; so naturally I was biased towards him. After the fest, he called me a couple of times but later on my number changed and now we are no longer in touch.




Even though it’s all in the past, here’s one thing about the lover boy that I keep bringing with myself in the future – his manners that are so understated nowadays. He was respectful, kind and thoughtful with his words and actions. And not once, did I feel weird talking to him. He wouldn’t call or text me everyday, or beg me to date him; he maintained his distance. I don’t think he used foul language, which is such an amazing thing, and I liked how soft-spoken he was, at least when talking to me. Plus, it was very difficult to ignore that intelligence.



If a child comes to Christ and begins attending church, there is a 4% likelihood that the family will follow suit.

If a woman converts and starts going to church, there is a 17% likelihood of that happening.

And what is the likelihood of it happening if a man converts and gets involved in church?  93%

~ Excerpt from Mark Buchanan’s blog (markbuchanan.net/man-up/)


While the statistics are in regard to religion, I feel they also point towards the influence the man of the house has over his family. If I have sons, I hope they are as mannerful as the lover boy. Because in all honesty, we have come across many jerks and have even behaved like one and surely we can do without it; we just need to look towards a good enough example. Umm, perhaps an example set by the lover boy?


Hence, quoting Mark Buchanan, I ask the same question:

Men, are you listening? Does this matter to you?

They will follow where you go. Do you know where you’re going?





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